ZeroGov

As a professional dominatrix and BDSM practitioner for over fifteen years, I’ve come to find a lot of satisfaction and joy within this lifestyle. From providing guidance and research resources to my clients to witnessing the transformation they undergo as they explore the kinkier side of life, BDSM gives me an unparalleled sense of accomplishment. But today I’d like to share some of my favorite aspects of BDSM that I’ve found to be particularly satisfying.

One of the aspects I’ve found most rewarding is the sense of connection and genuine care that is present in the skilled and healthy BDSM relationships that I’ve been privileged to participate in. It takes patience, trust, communication, and understanding to construct and pursue a successful consensually kinky relationship, and this core foundation allows for an intimate and deep sense of connection to form between both participant. Of all the relationships I’ve had the chance to be part of, there is nothing quite like the ones when this connection has been present.

Another area of BDSM I’ve found to be incredibly fulfilling is the most paradoxical one: negotiatiom. It may seem counterintuitive to find satisfaction in a sequence of awkward conversations, but it’s actually that exact conversation that establishes a cornerstone of consent, communication and safety in BDSM. There’s something so satisfying about being in an environment where everyone involved knows and acknowledges their limits and boundaries and has an understanding of what is expected. I see it as an opportunity to create something together that would otherwise be impossible alone.

Finally – and possibly most importantly – the aspect of trust in BDSM that I’ve found to be particularly rewarding. Trust is so often overlooked in regular relationships and many people don’t even realize how much of a factor it plays in every kind of bond. In kink, however, it takes on a much more prominent role in shaping the bond between partners, establishing the level of safety and comfort that is necessary and allowing for true exploration, connection and vulnerability. Establishing and maintaining trust between two consenting adults is in itself a huge feat, and being part of that is an incredible experience.

As I said, I’ve found a great deal of satisfaction in my work as a BDSM practitioner and Mistress. There’s no mistaking the thrill that I get after a successful BDSM scene, or the sense of accomplishment after helping a client find the courage to explore a dark fetish. My practice is something I take seriously, and these aspects of BDSM have served as constant reminders as to why it’s so important to me. Published here.

What advice does Mistress Eva have for couples who are looking to incorporate BDSM in their relationship?

When it comes to experimenting with BDSM (Bondage, Discipline, Domination/submission, Sadism/Masochism) as a couple, there’s no one-size-fits-all approach. Everyone’s interests and comfort levels are different, and each relationship enjoys its own dynamic. Fortunately, there are some general principles that can help couples navigate their way into the world of BDSM. Here is some advice from mistress eva for couples who are looking to incorporate BDSM in their relationship.

Communication is Key: Communicating with each other is essential when exploring BDSM. Be open about your interests, expectations, limits, and desires with your partner. Be honest and direct so that you both can work towards a safe, comfortable, and enjoyable exploration of BDSM.

Test the Waters: Don’t feel you need to jump into the deep end. Start small. Begin with role playing, light bondage, and some spanking. Build from these experiences to create the fun and intensity of BDSM that you’re looking for.

Set Ground Rules: Before even the discussion of BDSM takes place, it’s important to set some ground rules. Establish a safe word, a code word, or a signal to let your partner know if you’re uncomfortable or if the activity should pause. Also, set a time limit and negotiate a restraint for how far to go.

Understand Without Judgement: BDSM is not for everyone, and that’s okay. As long as its activities are consensual, it is a valid form of connecting with your partner. Respect each other’s thoughts and feelings around it and never judge anyone for their interests.

Build Trust: The BDSM activities performed require a high level of trust between the couple. Before progressing into more extreme BDSM play, it’s important to build a strong foundation of trust.

Practice Safety: There are safety measures for both the physical and psychological aspects of BDSM. Be sure that you both know your limits and, if any kind of restraint is used, have the necessary knowledge and equipment to utilize it safely.

Be Mindful of Consent: Of utmost importance is that any activities should be consensual. BDSM, unlike other forms of sex play, requires extreme levels of consent and understanding. Respect your partner’s boundaries and never take it too far.

These are just some of mistress eva‘s tips for couples who want to incorporate BDSM into their relationship. BDSM can be a wonderful way to express your sexuality and deepen the bond between partners. As long as the guidelines of communication, safety, and respect are followed, BDSM can be an exciting and enriching experience for both.